The Writer In Me Has The Itch!

Holli, I know it seems as if either you have a stalker, or I'm trying to "keep up with the Jones's", or even just downright copying you. Honestly, honestly from the heart THIS wasn't planned.

Last Thursday Mum and I noticed bird seed in little patches within the pattern of the living room carpet. We just thought that the last time I had cleaned out the birds cage some seed had been spilt, or that Snoopy had had a mad flap and flipped the seed four feet out of his cage? So, we vacuumed it up, thoroughly.

Anyway, last night when I got home, as I had been out to watch a barbershop choir rehearsal, knowing that Mum and I were going to check again today, I decided to have a quick peek before I went to bed. I wish I hadn't. Not only was hubby away for the night.....that's bad enough, but, yes you've guessed it, more bird seed. Embedded in the carpet pattern, a pile under the computer desk, alongside the computer desk, and two more piles just by the patio door. Now snoopy has got some wind distribution when he flaps, but not enough to get seed to completely the other side of the room, and under furniture to boot!

The most annoying thing, a lovely wooden ornament that was hand made for me as a leaving present from an old job had been destroyed. It was a wooden circular plate covered in seeds, nuts, acorns, and various shelled items and pine cones. Damn me if the little blighters hadn't chewed off the varnish and glue that covered it, and had the cheek to leave it in lovely little separate piles, but they had also eaten most of the seeds and nuts! Effing things.

I've briefed hubby via the mobile as he travels down or up (I don't know which)the motorway on his way home. He's not a happy bunny. No more DIY attempts with B&Q bought poison in pathetic little white trays. This time the big guns are out. I'm sending for Holli! No I'm sending for the council. They come out, assess the situation and place poison down in various places.

Cut to hubby coming home and big hugs all round. Blog resumed next day.

Anyway.....after showing hubby the evidence he has decided to tackle it himself after all. I know there's more than one.....and we will countdown each and every furry nut eating blighter. Sammy is coming on Sunday and staying until Tuesday. I will reiterate here that him and Snoopy do not get on. Therefore he is not allowed access to the room in which the mice are, or indeed where they will be poisoned.

Also, Snoopy is a "cage bird", cockatiels are renowned for their friendly temperament and easily hand tamed. He has the friendly temperament, but seems to have lost the skill to be hand tamed. Whenever, in the past, we let him fly freely around the room he loved it! He would land on the arms of the sofa or chairs and take sunflower seeds from your hand or mouth willingly. He adored it when we had spaghetti bolognese and would perch on hubby's plate and watch him eat. I think he thought hubby was eating a plate of worms!! But. When it came to getting him back into his cage we tried everything. He wouldn't come onto your hand or fingers and he wouldn't fly or walk back in himself. We had to resort to towel catching.......and I didn't agree that this was right. Not only did it stress poor Snoopy out, but it risked injuring him. So unfortunately he isn't allowed out anymore. Therefore he wont be able to gain access to said poison either.

No animals (apart from blooming mice) will be harmed in this process. That's a bit of a hypocritical statement isn't it.

Back to the main title of the blog. I have a meeting on Tuesday at 9am with w*** (work). Hopefully we will reach an amicable agreement for both sides with a plan for a phased return. Strictly part time as the doctor ordered. I have made a list of things to do before I return. Sort wardrobes and drawers, alphabetically arrange all cd's and dvd's. Sort through ancient casette tapes and clear some out. CLear out my hordes of tubes and jars of creams and bath oils from the bathroom cabinet, work out which ones I will use and throw away any opened ones.

Then I thought......once I'm back at w***, I will of course still be doing my Avon which will use up all of three quarters of an hour three times a week, plus an hour to sort and deliver my orders. I want to se the rest of my time constructively.

I AM going to write my book.

No more sitting here in the conservatory, on the sofa, surfing and e baying for hours on end, drinking endless cans of coke, and smoking copious amounts of cigarettes. I'm going to create myself a workstation and WORK.

I popped out to Tesco yesterday and bought myself a small notebook - to carry in handbag to make notes of ideas I have on the go. A large sectioned notebook for character analysis, storyline, plot etc, and a concertina folder for newspaper cuttings, loose notes and photographs etc. All of the above supplies being either pink or purple OF COURSE.

I came home, sat and had a sip of coke and a cigarette, and had my brain wave. The little bedroom has a lovely working space. It's supposed to be a dressing table, but all that was on it was a beautiful chinese tissue box, a jewellery mannequin, and a photgraph frame. All of which have now been found new homes in the room.

Next to the dressing table, which has a convenient knee space for sitting at, is a power socket. I have a wireless connection card for my laptop. The furniture for the big bedroom, part assembled, includes a chair. I have asked hubby to assemble this chair. I can then have a complete and comfortable working space to WRITE MY BOOK!!!!.

Hopefully the chair will be assembled tonight or tomorrow, and then Sunday or Monday I can lay out my needed items. Note books, folder, pens, highlighters, pencils, laptop and wireless card. Behind me I will have the tv and dvd player to play the sows I have recorded which will help me with my reference, and I'll be off.

Head down for at least an hour a day if not more. No more writers block. If I can write this much on my blog.........I can write my novel.

This is my new years resolution, well end of October beginning of November resolution. It will be completed. My college buddy has agreed to proof read for me. Then it will be placed in endless brown envelopes and sent to endless publishers for refusal......I will persevere until I find the right publisher, if not.....I'll take out a loan and oublish the darned thing myself. Anyone want to buy a copy?

Phew...............ramble galore today.

For now, peace and love for all.......except the mouses in my house. (I know that is incorrect, but for literary purposes it sounded good).

Hugssssssssssssssssss

Whisky

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I'm Gonna Get Smacked!

Mental preparation is in place. Getting smacked will be hard, it may hurt, but........it may also help me to improve my blogging skills, layout and content.

If you're not sure what getting "smacked" is, it's a website that reviews blogs. And believe me, they are a no holds barred bunch of people. I will make no reference to who else has been smacked. But I decided that I need a good hosing down.

It might be in weeks, it might be in months.....it's like being prepared for the secret shopper, or trying to get five stars in a hotel. My blog and myself will probably get blasted, critisized, panned etc etc etc. They may even advise me to remove it completely. But this will add to my "healing process" in more ways than one.

So.....I'm donning my hard hat. Normal blogging will resume instantly.....I just wanted to warn my blog what I have let us in for!

For now

Hugssssss

Whisky

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Family Tree And Our Garden Of Friends

I thought I would take the time to introduce you to all of the members of my family, and my garden of friends....I called it my garden of friends because it seems to be always growing :)

Here goes, starting with my side of the family.

Me - Dippy female known as Whiskyminx
Hubby - Soulmate and my best friend
Mum - My Mum, where I get my nutty side and my strength and determination from
Dad - My Dad, also where I get my nutty side my strength and determination from
Sister - My sister, eleven years older than me and running a public house
Brother In Law - Sisters hubby, helping to run a public house
Nephew J - Sis's Son, chef, mechanic and extremely tall
Neice D - Sis's daughter and like me, heavily into drama, singing and dancing

Hubby's side of the family

Mum S - Hubby's Mum, lovely, kind, caring and always lends an ear when needed
Dad S - Hubby's Dad, gentle and easy going, it's where hubby gets his traits from

Mr Bleach - One year younger than hubby and married to Sis In Law
Sis In Law - A year older than me ;) and married to Mr Bleach
Little Miss Purple - Daughter of the above and a purple addict
Little Miss Pink - Daughter of SIL and Mr B and heavily into pink

Brother C - Middle brother, lives in same town as the above
Sister In Law D - Married to Brother C
Neice A R - Daughter of the above
Nephew O - Son of the above

Brother S - Youngest brother, the same age as me, loves football
Sister In Law M - Married to Brother S and the mother of 3 lovely boys
Nephew L - Son of the above and studying hard at Universisty
Nephew M - Son of the above and loves to have a rough and tumble with hubby
Nephew T - Son of the above and also loves to have a rough and tumble with hubby

Our Garden Of Friends

Not sure where to start here as I don't want to offend anyone! Maybe it's best to start with those we have known for the longest :)

College Buddy - We met at drama college 19 years ago, and have been firm friends ever since. There have been years when we were out of touch, but now we see each other regularly and are never short of a conversation. So much in common, especially our love for drama, singing, reading and writing. She is currently studying hard for a degree in English literature. I'm sure she will pass with flying colors and have the well deserved letters after her name.

BRS friend - She was my boss, but soon became my friend. I looked up to her, and we went through some tough times together where we worked. We were soon known as the terrible twosome.....have lost touch recently, but I'm sure our friendship will go from strength to strength.

BRS Security Friend - I met this man on my first day working there, he realised I was a bad car parker and saved me "my" space every morning for two years. Supported BRS friend and I in our bad times and still remains a good friend.

Ex Friend J - Someone I met when I first had my Ileostomy bag. I offered to talk to her has she had just suddenly had to have the same operation. We were good friends, again inseperable, but too much so. In my eyes theres only room for one person who demands so much of my time, and that's hubby. She recently got back in touch with me to try and reconcile our differences. Yes it was brave of her, but I'm one for sticking by my judgements. There's only one person allowed to sit and watch me through my letterbox and that's Robbie Williams!!

Clever Crafting Friend (CCF) - We met at one of my old jobs. We worked in the same office space and soon became friends. She introduced me to everyone, helped me when I was down, always supported me when I was ill, and has listened to my tales of woe too many times to mention. I hope I have been as supportive of her as she has of me. SHe has seen me through my hospital stays, my confinement to my house, and my integration back into society. As well as encouraging my crafting skills she has helped me to realise how much a real friend can mean to me, and that I will always be grateful for.

Navie Wifie - Again we met in the same job. On her introduction to the company as with everyone, she sat with me to see what my job entailed and how it linked in with hers. I knew I knew her face, but couldn't remember where from. It turned out we went to the same school, she drank in my parents pub, we married in the same month on the same year and had our reception at the same hotel. We got on straight away, crosswords galore at lunchtime! Again, she has been one of my rocks with my illness, always there, and always sending me the sweetest and funniest e mails to brighten my day. We may not speak or see each other often, due to family comittments, but along with CCF she is one of my most cherished friends.....Maybe I don't tell them that enough.

Flowergirl - (slight name change here) We met online in a chatroom. Her and her partner and I hit it off instantly. Laughs.....I've never laughed so much as when I chat with them. The strangest thing is, whenever we are chatting we always say the same thing at the same time SNAP!! It's as if we are tuned into each other minds. Again, she has helped me no end with my emotional times. Given me advice relating to Ex Friend J, which I completely ignored much to my own stupidness. Hubby and I went to visit them in their home town for a weekend. Scared we wouldn't get on in "reality". Doubts soon disappeared.....we had a blast that weekend, and hope to do it again soon, when hubby's work schedule allows. She recently stopped with me for a weekend. A true girly weekend, hair straightening, eyebrow plucking, eating, drinking and laughing until we cried. And yes......I did blub when she left :(

Dr Pepper - Flowergirl's partner. Again we met in a chat room. He was the one that made me feel welcome, and insisted I come back. Both him and Flowergirl defended me during one particularly nasty experience. ALways fun, always playing the best music.....and now a firm drinking buddy for hubby, and a firm friend for me :)

Pingu - Again we met in a chat room. American through and through, and extremely shy! It's only taken her eighteen months to send us her picture! When I came out of hospital one time, I arrived home and she had sent me a get well card....that meant the world to me. Now it's tradition to send each other the dishiest pictures of men in postcard form we can find when we go on holiday. Another true internet friend who one day I hope to meet.

Archie - Again we met in the same chatroom. He organised quizzes and dedicated his time to opening his room especially for this when the other room closed due to friendship breakdowns. I know we aren't in touch often, but he has told me he reads the blog occasionally. I often think of him and hope he is still keeping well :)

Holli - My first blogging friend. I only wrote last week on her wedding dedication page how we met. Next blog, same format as mine and an amazing writer. She shares her emotional ups and downs, and Faith's (her daughters) growth with an outstanding number of readers. We have in common, our height ;) our age, and our love for blogging and music. SOmeone I admire, and aspire to when I think of my writing....maybe she can give some hints when I finally start writing my novel!!

Stephaine - Another fellow blogger with a wicked sense of humour. We haven't been in touch much recently, but again I admire her writing skills and her blunt honesty when it comes to her work colleagues ;)

Moggie - Again I found this blog via hitting the next blog button. I was amazed and astounded at his beautiful photography and instantly saved it to my favourites. He has inspired me to try and take some artistic photo's. Some of which I will soon share when I finally complete my holiday diary. I now look at everything with a different eye. Tree's, flowers, the sky, animals and insects. A supportive friend when I am down and for that I will be eternally grateful. I hope this new found friendship will continue for many many more years.

Pickle - A friend of Moggie's and again shares his life in pictures. Not photographs like Moggie, but the most amazing drawings I have ever seen. He takes in stray and injured animals, heals them with love and dedication and helps to find new homes for them. We share a love of animals. He recently sent me a drawing of him, Moggie and Pickle. Blogworld may seem like a bigt place, but you can still find friends that feel like family. I am proud to be part of Moggie and Pickle's extended family :) Again his kind words have helped me through many a pickle ;)

Ladyhawk - A friend of Moggie's and a fellow photographer.....she has an eye for detail, and along with Moggie takes the most amazing pictures. She is now my surrogate "hugger" for Moggie when he is feeling low. Another person who offers me kind words when they are needed :)

Divemuster - Another friend of Moggie and Ladyhawk. Another amazing photographer. He seems a little shy to me, but that might be because I don't know him as well as Moggie. Recently became another year younger and Moggie dedicated a wonderful picture to him ;)

NN (Chinese Buddy) - A long time ago hubby was looking through cv's for a couple of jobs he had to emply people for. I helped him narrow down those that he should interview. Automatically knocking out those with spelling mistakes! This person's cv was one of the ones I helped to select for an interview. She got the job and became one of hubby's employees. We met up for lunch one day, hubby and I and her and her hubby. We hit it off straight away. Such a lovely warm, friendly person who always makes me feel happy and cared for. She spols me something rotten and she shouldn't! She isnt just "an ex employee of hubby in his old job" but a true friend.

V - Also an emplyee of hubby's in his old job, and Sammy the dog's owner. We met up as we had agreed to look after Sam while they went away for a few days. It was to make sure that Sam liked us, and that I liked him. SIx of us, hubby and I, NN and her hubby, and V and her hubby went for Sunday lunch. We had a lovely time, and again all hit it off. Thankfully Sam and I hit it off too and we now look after him whenever the need arises. V and her hubby are now good friends, and bbq's with spiders create a wonderful atmosphere. She also introduced me to cous cous and now I can't get enough of it!

I think that covers everyone.....but If I have missed anyone off I am truly sorry. This has taken me two days to do as I wanted to make truthful and honest comments about anyone without being "over the top". If I have missed you, think of yourself as a seed yet to be planted......there is plenty of room in my garden for everyone to flourish and grow.

I hope this has introduced a little bit more of my life to you.

For everyone above, and every reader....special hugs today

Love

Whisky

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It Wasn't Me It Was The Calculator.....Honest Guv!

Problem solved. Friday night hubby and I sat and went through everything Avon related. I checked all of the prices on the invoice against what was on the orders. The all added up. Hubby did the usual and created a spreadsheet for me. And we finally narrowed it down to gues who's orders.......mine!

I hadn't allowed for the fact I had ordered three of one item, and the calculator's number 7 has miscalculated my total as well. Problem solved and the missing four pounds was found! Phew. Hubby has now agreed to being my administrator.......and I agreed, knowing if I didn't I would offend him.

So, normality resumed and we celebrated with one biiiig chinese take away :)

More orders were collected on Friday evening and I was well over my total for comission. I actually enjoy it! Whilst I was calling on one of my neighbours to see if they wanted to order anything, they asked me into the house as they needed some advice. The daughter wanted a waterproof mascara as she has sensitive skin. Not only did I advise her which one she needed, but I also knew exactly which page it was on! Hows that for customer satisfaction.

Saturday was spent in a lazy way. When we got back from holiday I realised I had run out of my sleeping tablets. I decided to try Tesco own sleep aid, a hermal remedy. The first night went well.....slept straight through, but I think that was post holiday exhaustion. After that it all went downhill. Awake at 2am, 3am, 4am tossing and turning, and always tired. I finally got my repeat prescription on Friday. Took my tablets that night and slept like a baby.

Hubby of course questioned whether I needed them. I explained that I hadn't slept properly since we had been back. He asked if I had taken them on holiday and was surprised when I said yes. They are always needed, especially when you have pulled a muscle in your back and are in pain. As well as helping to block out the memories of 30+ surgeries, and horror stories from being in the hospital. Even when your exhausted your mind can remember even the smallest details.....even if you are on holiday!

He finally agreed that taking sleeping tablets was a small price to pay for what I have been through over the last 12 or so years.

Knowing I had to go to the post office to pay in my Avon money on Saturday I set my alarm for 10am. I got up, had breakfast and waited for hubby to return from shopping with the papers. He got back, gave me the papers and said.....I'll pop to the post office now for you like you asked me to last night! I hadn't asked him, and it was really sweet of him to do this.....but if I had known I would have spent an extra hour in bed!

We sat together, me on the pc catching up on blogs and e mails and him reading the paper. I had my lunch, the remains of the huuuuge chinese from the night before (always safe as I have done this on numerous occasions), and decided to go for an hours sleep. Normally it takes me at least an hour to get to sleep, so I assumed I would just lie and think, get bored and get up. No, hubby woke me up just in time for You've Been Framed three hours later! He had even been out to a few shops and I hadn't heard him leave or come back! I must have needed it.

We sat together and watched YBF and hubby was in stitches. I watched the X factor, predicted who would be evicted as hubby cooked the tea. Answered all of the questions correctly on the lottery quiz show and we settled down to eat dinner. Why we always eat at the same time as Casualty is on I'll never know! I have to tell hubby to look away when they are using needles, and he has to tell me to look away, block my ears and sing when they are re inserting a dislocation! Nice when you are eating steak and jacket potatoes.

Sunday.....hubby went off to his Mum and Dads to help chop down a lilac tree that was in the way of their soon to be built extension. I got up at a disgusting time! and was just settling down to read the papers and eat my breakfast when he came back. Put it this way, he left at 9am and came back at 2p. Tutt Tutt.

Hubby prepapred the stew (he always loves to cook at the weekends, and says it gives me a rest as I cook all week), and I went to distribute yet more Avon books, and collect the odd order. Guess what......it was raining, heavily! My last call was a lovely lady about 15 doors away from us. We have chatted every time I have called, and she knows I have been off work ill, and I know she has had the builders in. Lets call her Mrs M. Anyway, I rang her bell, and politely stepped away from the door as I always do. She took one look at me, and dragged me into the house, told me to take off my coat, handed me a towel, sat me in front of the fire and made me a hot coffee. She even volunteered to give me shot of whisky in it, but I declined. I helped her choose her order as she isn't very good at finding the shades she wants of make up, and left her with a wet patch on her hall tiles. She didn't mind and gave me strict instructions to go home and have a hot bath!

I did, a lovely bubble filled Avon blackberry burst bath. Heaven. As hubby was aching all over from digging and chopping I ran him a eucalyptus muscle relaxing bath and told him to soak for a while to ease the pain. He came down, I was on the net placing my Avon order then I caught NN (my friend and an emplyee of hubby in his hold job) on MSN and we had a good chat.

Dinner was scrummy, then we watched Prime suspect. SOmehow we ended up top to tail on the sofa massaging each others feet. I dont know how it happened but hubby ended up in my pink and purple slipper socks! Cute!!

Exhausted hubby retired to bed, and I smothered him in cocoa butter moisturiser on his peeling bits. I told him to keep moisturising as soon as we got back, but does he listen......naaah. I have diligently moisturised every night after my bath and am not peeling at all......serves him right. After all a woman ALWAYS know best, right girls?

Here I am at 1.07am typing this up. I thought I'll just write a few lines as I haven't posted for a couple of days, what happens, I go off on one and type war and peace in one go.

I hope everyone had a good weekend, and I hope I haven't bored you with my extremely detailed ramblings.

For now......goodnight, good morning, and good afternoon.

P.s. could the R O D reader let me know who they are? It could be Navie Wifey, but you know me I'm curios.

Hugs for all

Whisky


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Lets All Highlight My Inadequacies!

I'm renowned for being a perfectionist. I'm also renowned for starting projects and not finishing them. As well I pride myself in not being defeated, and if I can't do something I will learn or seek advice to enable me to do it.

One of my weaknesses is arithmetic. I can't add much together unless it's simple. I used to be able to do bookkeeping. For my parents at the pub. I used to be able to do payroll, petty cash, expenses, fuel charges and tachographs in previous jobs, as well as contract finances. When it comes to myself. CR** springs to mind.

As you know I've started doing Avon. Last night, thanks to a certain person, I was made to feel as small as a flea. Just because his background has always been financially orientated. Just because he can look at a row of 20 figures and add them up in seconds. Just because he is business minded. Just because a penny to him is a million pounds.

I know he was trying to help, but does he have to do it in such a way that makes me feel so insignificant and inadequate. I lost it. I even swore at him, which I'm not sure he heard due to the fact I slammed the door at exactly the same time.

I try and do something to the best of my ability, something I enjoy, something that may earn me a few extra pounds that I can actually have in my purse instead of it being empty. What do I get. Belittled, thats what I get.

I coud have sworn when we made our vows that he said with all my wordly goods I honour thee?! Maybe I was wrong. Maybe he said whats yours is yours and whats mine is my own and you keep your hands off it. Maybe it's my fault for being ill and off work for the past two years.

Oh well....another day another dollar as they say.

If it hadn't been gone eleven o clock maybe it would have been "freddy Starr all over again. But this time my bag would have been packed.

On a lighter note, my college buddy has just been to visit me. We swapped tales of our Robbie concerts, she was there the night after me, and managed to get in exactly the same place as we did. She managed to bring a smile to my face.

Was yesterday Friday the 13th or was that last week?

Gggggrrrrrr. Moody Whisky doesn't suit me.

Maybe tonight as we "sort it" I'll just walk out of the room and leave "the master" to it. I'll settle down in front of the telly as he takes over my one task yet again.

Maybe I'll remove this post in case word gets back to him, maybe I won't. Who knows.

Tomorrow will be another day.

Hugs

Whisky

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67 Days Til Christmas!!!

Can you believe it?! This year has gone soooo quickly. I can still remember my Christmas dinner...and it seems like only yesterday. I need to get organised....do lists, take requests. Makes mental note, must remember NOT to buy for any adults hehehehe.

What a week. Sammy arrived on Friday evening, and was a pleasure to have in the house as always :) Hubby and I had a play fight one night, and he even put himself in the middle so we wouldn't hurt each other bless him! The house was guarded, I was guarded, and he even nipped one of my neighbours bums when we were out for a walk. Thankfully she had a sense of humour!

The Robbie concert has been recorded and delivered to Sis In Law, and recorded again for my college buddy who is coming on Friday. I don't mind...it gives me an excuse to sit and watch it again, and again.

I delivered some of my Avon books at the weekend and need to collect them tonight. Hopfully there will be some orders :) I'm really enjoying it actually, especially when the delivery arrives and I have to sort it for everyone.....its like Christmas....did I mention Christmas is only 67 days away?!

I received my letter from the occupational health doctor. Another good one, saying I should only be looking at part time work for the long term. I just hope that fits in with W***. If not.....who knows. I still havent heard from them, so I will give them a ring shortly. Wish me luck.

Just a brief post today as I need to do some stuff. I've got a visitor this afternoon, I need to collect my Avon books, and I need to tidy up before my Mum comes round tomorrow to help me with the housework!

See you soon....

Love and hugs

Whisky

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Congratulations to Holli, Tom, Faith and Nate Nate On Their Special Day

Today......a very special lady marries a very special man. He is taking her as his wife, and taking into his fold her beautiful daughter Faith, and her beloved best friend Nate Nate (Nathan) the King Charles Spaniel.

I say today....14th October 2006 in America.

I came accross Holli and Faith's blog completely by accident. I hadn't been blogging long myself, and to help with my confidence I would sit for hours pressing the "next blog" button and reading other peoples sites.

What attracted my attention to their blog was that it was the same color format as mine. I thought, someone else with good taste, and settled down to have a quick read. Normally next blog has taken me to political blogs, recipe blogs, weather and engineering blogs. That day was different, and that blog was different. It was, and still is, a blog or daily online diary purely for Faith to read when she is older. On there Holli has shared both hers and Faith's life with us. Her "Bot Bot" challenges, her major problems involving surgery with her ears, Nate Nate and an attempted poisoning. I soon realised that this shared life wasn't just interesting, it was written in such a way that the reader immediately became consumed with understanding, drawn into the daily goings on of an American family.

I plucked up the courage to send a couple of comments, and was soooo pleased when I got a reply. Soon I was amazed to find my blog was linked on Holli's site, and so I linked hers from mine. Blog friendship commenced.

Always encouraging, no matter what turmoils she is suffering herself. Someone I admire more than she will ever know.

I announced their engagement on the blog......and the wedding day seemed so far away. Since my return from holiday I have been counting down to Holli, Tom, Faith and Nate Nate's big day. Finally tonight, here I am trying to work out if their wedding was at such and such a time, what time is that in the UK?!

What I really wanted to say, on this very special day is:-

(image copyright of Hollibolli, and I hope she forgives me for even daring to use it....I wanted to use something precious to her on her precious day, any complaints raised and it will be removed)

Holli, thankyou for your encouragement and continuous kind words. Thankyou for inspiring me to carry on with my blog. Thankyou for letting all of your online friends share in your's, Faiths' and Nate Nate's life.....and now Tom's too.

Faith, I'm sure each day you realise just what a precious Mommy you have....now she has added to your life, someone else who will smother you with love.

Nate Nate, stay away from the lip balm and body butter ok buddy!!

Tom.....take care of them all :)

Please join me in wishing Holli and Tom, Faith and Nate Nate a very special wedding day. If you can, raise just one glass to them tonight......everyone take one small sip, look skyward and make a wish.

Faith of course will be the cutest bridesmaid in AMerica ;) and Nate Nate will be the best ring carrier ever!!

All my love and hugs

Whisky


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Fighting Back! Proud Whisky Takes Control

As i guessed, Wednesday night there was really no point in going to bed. I left it until I was completely exhausted, and presumed I was that tired that no thoughts about Thusrdays meeting would wander through my subconscious. Boy was I wrong.

2.30 babies next door singing and crying again!

At 5.00am I gave up and came and sat downstairs. I think I had two hours sleep in total. My tummy was rumbling so I had my toast. Hubby soon came downstairs and was gobsmacked I was awake.

Mum and Dad cam round at 9am and I was surprised. I thought I might get a wave of tiredness.....but that didn't happen until later. My phot's arrived.....well chuffed to hold a picture of Robbie in one hand and a piccy of hubby in the other. I had my bath, and sat and waited for hubby to pick me up.

I was shaking all the way to see the occupational health doctor. Even though he had been so supportive of me last time, I thought the fact we had been on holiday might just blow it for me.

Anyway.....he finally waltzed in.....took one look at me and I saw his face change. He said he remembered me from his first vist, but that he couldnt believe the difference in me. I told him what had happend since our last chat. The Infliximab and the anaphylactic shock. The six or seven more surgeries, the diagnosis of the Hidradenitis Suupuritiva and the Pyoderma Gnagrenosum. His face again changed at the mention of these, and he even looked skywards looking for assistance?!

I gave him the info I had printed off the web about the two conditions, but he said he was familiar with them both. He asked me where I had the HS, and I told him groin not armpit like most people.

I said I had seen Mr R in August, that he was pleased with me, that he had recommended a holiday before I return to work. Ahhh he said. For what reason a hoiliday. I replied for social re interaction and to strenghten my back which hasnt been supporting my weight for over two years. He asked if it had worked and looked at hubby. We both said yes. The holiday wasn't mentioned again. But he did say that my social re interation must be a good idea due to the fact that for the last two years or so I have hardly been out of the house. He laso mentioned that I no longer look pale. D'oh!! I've got a tan. Didn't the hair braids give it away. It obviously wasn't an issue about the holiday LOL.;

To cut a longish story short. He asked what my ideal was, asked for hubby's opinion which I thought was great, as he is obviously aware that hubby knows me better than I know myself sometimes. I told him my main worry was becoming overtired, and that I would know when I had reached my maximum work capacity. He told me I was a clever woman with a tongue in my head and it was up to me to be firm and speak up for myself.

I know that none of this guarantees' that work will have me back. They might takeone look at the "long term part time" approach and say they don't have a position available for me. At least I've put my ideas accross. I've admitted I am ready to return. Which in itself is a big step for me. Now the fears really can come into reality. Clever Crafting Friend and Navie Wifey may remember some of what happend when I tried to return to work at a previous job. At that time I was naive of my illness compared to now. I thought I could carry on no matter what. At that time it was NOT an option for me to go part time. To me that was admitting defeat. But to have all sorts hurled at you, to be accused of things that never happened, or that had been totally misconstrued. To be forced into a corner dusing a meeting which hubby attended, and even he ended up shedding a few tears in terms of stress.....I've learned my lesson.

The first sign that work really don't want me there, or that they are making things difficult for me to return. No more coweing in corners and doing their bidding, and keeping quiet. No more getting home from work and crying all of the time with stress. No more. This time around I'll stand up for myself, and my illness.

Did I ask to have this illness. No. Would I get rid of it. No. It has helped shape me into the person I am today. For once I am proud to say I have Crohn's disease. I have an Ileostomy bag. I have HS and I have Pyoderma Gangrenosum. None of these can be cured, or taken away from me. They are as much a part of me as the mole on my eyebrow......and I'm proud of all of it.

I'm proud of all of me!!

Rant over.

I guess I'll get the letter tomorrow or Monday. Then I'll wait for work to contact me with a view to arranging a meeting with hubby in attendance. I guess that will bring with it a few more sleepless nights.

Yesterday we got home. I rang my Mum to let her know how it had gone. Made a cheese toasty, and went to bed. Hubby woke me at 6pm and I was still exhausted. Eventually I woke up, ate my tea and watched intermittent holiday/diy programmes in one room with hubby, or Robbie in the living room. Then Criminal Minds came on on Five. I watched that, and a programme about a woman who had identical quads sharing one placenta. Another strong woman! I crawled up to bed, drank my whisky and zonked.

Here I am today on Friday 13th. I was up at eleven.....good for me, and Sammy is coming tonight :) Oh how I adore doggy sitting :) :) My furry buddy will be with me until Monday I think, then again at the end of October, and for possible a fortnight in November.......doggy heaven!!!

Anyway. Milky coffee drunk and I've rambled as if I've been on a caffeine hit, which I have. I must go and type up some more of my holiday diary!

Love and a million hugs to all

A Proud Whisky

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Scared Whisky Taking Over!!

Tomorrow is the big day. The day I meet with the Occupational Health Doctor I saw two years ago. He was sent out by W*** to assess if I was genuinely ill. The letter he sent to W*** after his visit amazed me. He was totally on my side, telling them to remember what I had been through over the last ten years, which at that point included over 20 operations. I wonder if his next letter to them might say over 30!

As you know from my pre holiday post, I have mentioned to no one, anything about the holiday (oooooooh baaaaad grammar). I wanted to make sure where I stood first with the disability rights commission. I am well prepared to answer him tomorrow with the advise given to me by them, and my surgeon if need be. I think those who know me personally, if you have seen me since my return will see the difference in me from before my holiday and now.

I was paranoid in the second week....being restricted on weight for luggage I tried every item of clothing on that I was taking with me. What's the point of packing a pair of shorts if they don't fit. And having three wardrobe sizes in one wardrobe doesn't help! There's the really poorly Whisky stuff....size 10. The poorly but ok Whisky stuff, size 12. The doing ok Whisky size 14....and the Oh No you need to lose weight Whisky stuff, bigger size 14 and the odd size 16 jeans to accomodate my bag. Anyway, it was mainly size 12 items that were packed. On the second week one item I out on that fit before we left, no longer fitted. I had to go out with the zip and buttons undone....knowing the length of my tee shirt covered my dignity!!

I was sure I had gone up by at least half a stone!!! I weighed myself the other night....no weigh gained at all!! Then I twigged. While we were away I drank tonnes of water.....and I don't normally do that. I hate water! If I had a milky coffee, I had a glass of water afterwards....when we got back from a walk or lie on the beach, another glass of water, afternoon milky coffee, glass of water....back from our evening meal, glass of water and another before I went to bed with my Whisky. I guess it's all water retention as my body isn't used to that amount of water! I'm still peeing for England now!!

So...no weight gained PHEW!!

Now here's for the upsides of the holiday. For the whole duration except naps, sleeps and sunbathing (which I dont do as much of as hubby as I am fair skinned) I was SAT all of the time. This is the girl that six months ago couldn't sit at all. Breakthrough number one.

When we arrived in Majorca I was still wearing two dressings. Third day of holiday I dropped down to ONE!!! Breakthrough number two!

Again when we arrived, I had dark circles under my eyes. Due, no doubt, to my terrible sleeping pattern. I've looked at all of the pictures we took.....no dark circles! and too boot....my old whisky sparkly eyes are back!! Breakthrough number three.

My legs are stronger, and my back, although it gave way for three days while we were away is now used to supporting my weight sitting. Breakthroughs three and four.

Now I need a drumroll!!!!..........................

The woman who has been proud to wear, and admit she wears net knickers to hold her dressings correctly.............is now no lo0nger having to wear net knickers!!! Woooohooooo!!! I can finally wear my Sloggi's and Playtex big knickers. (They have to be the big ones for my bag). And my final dressing, which I know I can soon wean myself off rests just nicely...no netties needed. Breakthrough five!!!

That's the evidence I can tell to the Doctor tomorrow. And that's the evidence I can thank Mr R my surgeon with in November, as long as I keep going up the ladder rather than down. It's thanks to him, Hubby, my family and my friends that I'm here. It's thanks to Mr R that I went on holiday and made so much progress....and yes I did send him a postcard.

Why am I scared about tomorrow?! Because I know it could all be thrown back in my face. If I think negatively, and the positive happens it's a bonus. SO what if I get sacked, and I have to stay at home writing my book and doing my Avon. So what. I'll still be me! As for the book.............sooooo many ideas while we were away. Hubby now knows the storyline and even helped me come up with the title....I just need to check copyrights and stuff on it. You guys have probably guessed my idea?! What else could a woman who loves writing and music write about?! You guessed it. Music and murder!!! Those of you who know me will be aware that I have been saying this for years. I've got an idea, I will write it. Well although those Ideas were good, and I still may use them. They weren't THE right one for me to start with. One pice of advise I was given was write about what you know. Music, singin, being in a band I KNOW about. I have friends I can turn to for some of the research. I've got this in the bag guys. Look out for me competing with Stephen King, and Patricia Cornwell for the number one spot in a couple of years.......but promise me you'll read the dedications........they might take up most of the book!!!!!!

Anyway..........more rambling from the Robbie fan. Tonight I probably won't sleep. I'll have nightmares about seing this doctor tomorrow. But the night after that is another night :)

Wish me luck.

Lots of love and hugssssssssssssssssssssss

Whisky

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I Missed Robbie.......But I Miss Hubby More!!!!

We both decided last night that we didn't miss the tv one bit while we were away. I agreed and then realised I have approx twelve hours of pre recorded stuff to plough through!! I had set both dvd's and videos's and so had Mum.

One thing I REALLY REALLY missed was music! It was great when we came accross a cafe or restaurant where we could either hear english music on the radio or hear it being played from a live venue nearby. One night we even came accross a Robbie Williams impersonator....but more of that when my diary is uploaded!

All holiday I was frustratedly trying to hear Robbie's new single.....or basically anything Robbie. I finally realised the one restaurant where we spent most of our time had internet access, and ear phones. Quickly I jumped onto You tube found the video and sat back to drool and listen. Bummer headphones didn't work!!!!

Anyway....the last few days Robbie has either been blaring on the pc, stero or tv. I missed my green eyed hunk and his dulcet tones...his tatto'd muscles and come to bed smile.

Then, today, hubby went back to work :( He was working from home yesterday, so although he was sat beside me working away, he was still here.

Today, is the first day in nearly three weeks what we haven't been together for 24 hours every day. I miss him like crazyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy.

His smile....his laugh, the odd touch or tormenting joke. Making him coffee, calling him to do something tedious like open a bottle of water. Hugs, smiles, everything..........I can't wait until he comes home!!!! Fourteen years of marriage, twenty years together and I still can't get enough of him!

Yes....sometimes I climb upstairs to get some "me time" To read, listen to music, or just daydream.......but he understands I need that time and lets me have it.

Come hooommmmeeeee hubbbbbbyyyyyyy!!!!

I was up at eleven which was early for me, but late by the last two weeks standards. Maybe my body has adjusted now to needing less sleep...I hope so....more time to listen to Robbie ehehehehehehehehehe!

I'm eagerly awaiting the release of the next album on 23rd of this month....finding the new single in the shops.....and finding out when he might do his next tour!! I still keep looking at Live At Leeds and thinking I was in that Spot there.....everytime my stomach goes. I remember the brightness of the lights....the volume, the mpovement in my stomach from the bass line, the heat from the pyrotechnics as we were so close. I was sure at one point that the woman in front of me was on fire!!!! Then telling hubby to turn round to video the "uprisal" of Robbie. My hands, and throat hurt by the end of the show...endless clapping, arm thrusting, and screaming of Robbie Robbie Robbie or Whoooop Whooop in the relevant places. I'm still in shock that I've seen the guy live. I think I've said before, but on that night, seing him soooo close made him become real. A real genuine human being, not an idol, someone with feelings and emotions justlike me.

Blimey, how much can one girl rant on about a pop star....sorry human being!!

Enough whittering for now...I need to start typing up my holiday diary to upload it on here. That way I can bore you all in one hit LOL.

Hugs for everyone..... I think the mad woman has finally returned!!!

Whisky

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Óla!!!

Yup....I'm back! We had a wonderful holiday....so much to tell you!! But near the end I missed my Mum and Dad, I missed Snoopy my bird, I missed my house and I missed my BLOG!!!!!!!!

Whilst we were away I carried with me a little notebook and kept a daily diary......I'm planning on typing into my word section and putting it all on here in one big hit. I'll add pictures in relelvant places etc to guide you through the thrills and spills of Majorca.

Coming home was bliss....Sis In Law (SIL) collected us from the airport, and a fter a near miss, a VERY near miss with a runaway child bolting into the road in front of her car we travelled home. After only two coach rides in Spain I felt as if we were on the wrong side of the road!!! How strange is that!

I received some bad news as soon as we got home, via text. A Paltalk chat friend has passed away. he will be missed, and my thoughts are with his family and friends right now.

Once I was over the shock, we sat and had coffee and bored SIL with our tales of the holiday....she seemed in awe of my tan, and my hair braids.....I'm a 5ft2" half braided bo derek LOL.

Yesterday we went and did our shopping, visited hubby's parents and then mine. Got home, settled the bird in, and chilled out. Me catching up on blogworld and stuff, and hubby checking his work e mails.

The evening was spent wrapped up in jogging pants, socks, and jumpers with the heating on! It was 29 degree's in spain and back here it's only 14 degrees or less at night. We are COLD!!!!!

Oh, one of the first things I did on the net was find the new Robbie Wiliams video for his soon to be released single Love Light. If you scroll down on the blog you'll find the link to teh You Tube video.

I warn you.....if you are a Robbie fan, as I am, you'll be drooling over your keyboard. The video rocks.....the music is fabby! A little George Micheal esque, but I can see where Robbie is heading with this one. SO if this song and Rudebox are anything to bo on, the long awaited album released on the 23rd of THIS month should be yet another fantabuloso cd!!!

I missed Robbie so much I even sat and watch the Leeds concert again last night. All I was thinking was, less than three weeks ago I was in THAT spot at Milton Keynes and he looked at ME!!!!!!

Phew! Too much Robbie for one day.

I'm off to go do some more surfing.

Take care......I missed you all, and Martin and Leojnia (sp) If you read this............thankyou, and I missssss youuuuuuu!!!! Sniff sniff.

A fortnights worth of hugsssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss

Lots of love

Whisky

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ádios for now